Everyday Play

Play is an essential component of healthy childhood development. It is the language and the work of children. Through play, kids express their inner lives and emotions, experiment with problem-solving, and rehearse new social or life skills. Yet as adults, we often forget that children are not miniature adults. They can’t always verbalize what they feel or need. And as we get caught up in the busyness of life, many of us lose touch with our own sense of playfulness.

But to a child, playfulness is the birthplace of joy, laughter, safety, and connection. It’s one of the quickest ways to shift a tense moment, build emotional attunement, and strengthen your relationship. Here are a few simple ways to weave more play into everyday life:

Use a silly voice. A child’s whining can sound like nails on a chalkboard to an overstimulated parent. Playfulness and laughter, however, can reset the nervous system for both of you. Try something like: “Uh-oh, MomBot cannot compute a whining voice. Please try again before MomBot powers down!” A lighthearted response often diffuses tension and invites cooperation.

Use car time for connection. Even short drives offer small pockets of opportunity. Take turns making up a story one sentence (or one word) at a time, or play I Spy by looking for letters, numbers, signs, or landmarks instead of colors. These tiny moments of connection add up.

Make chores and responsibilities fun. Turn routines into playful challenges. Set a timer for a quick toy clean-up and challenge your child to beat their previous time. Pretend the floor is lava and you have to work together to rescue all the stuffies. Or become Mission Control: “The spaceship is counting down for launch! Grab your space gear—shoes and jacket—so we can start the Mars mission!”

Shift to teamwork and collaboration. Rather than focusing on misbehavior, shift into a shared story:

“The arguing monster is here! Quick—what should our team do before it takes over the whole house?”

“You want to wear your superhero cape to the store? I wonder what superpowers we’ll need there!”

“Hmm, our listening ears must be missing. Let’s get out our magnifying glass to find where they wandered off to.”

“Patience feels tricky right now. Can you put on your patience hat while I finish up?”

Common Barriers to Everyday Play

Even when we know playfulness is helpful, many parents bump up against the same internal barriers. Here are a few of the most common and how to gently work through them.

“I don’t have time!” It can feel impossible to add one more thing to an already full day. But playful connection doesn’t require extra time! It often takes only a few seconds. You can slip it into the moments you already share: while buckling car seats, moving between activities, brushing teeth, or walking to the door. Those brief, lighthearted interactions can shift the tone of an entire afternoon. Think of play not as an added task, but as a different way of responding within the time you already have.

“I feel silly!” That’s actually a sign you’re doing it right! Play taps into parts of ourselves that adulthood often quiets, like imagination, spontaneity, and humor. Feeling silly at first is normal. With practice, it becomes more natural and even enjoyable. And your willingness to lean into that silliness communicates safety and openness to your child.

“I’m not creative.” You don't have to be! Playfulness is less about clever ideas and more about the posture you bring to a moment. Having just a few simple tools like a silly voice, a playful prompt, or a quick pretend scenario, can spark new ideas on their own. And children are naturally imaginative; once you open the door, they’ll often run with it. Your job is simply to join in.

Playfulness doesn’t require extra time, extra energy, or an endless imagination. It simply invites us to meet our children where they naturally thrive. Even a few seconds of shared silliness can defuse stress, strengthen connection, and remind your child that they are safe, seen, and accepted and loved just as they are. In the midst of daily routines, play can be one of the simplest and most powerful tools in your parenting toolbox.

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